HEADLINES THIS WEEK

front page:
HOLY SPIRIT SKIPS CHAPEL TO GO TO CHIPOTLE

local:
ROOMMATE LEAVES 5 TYPES OF BODILY FLUID IN SHOWER OVER COURSE OF SEMESTER

sports:
NCU BASKETBALL STANDS COLLAPSE, ALL FOUR IN ATTENDANCE DEAD.

politics:
“ABORTION IS MURDER” BUMPER STICKER REPLACED WITH “ABORTION IS A VERY COMPLICATED ISSUE FOR WHICH THERE IS NO CUT AND DRY ANSWER”

relationships:
GAY BLACK MAN SICK OF STRAIGHT WHITE PEOPLE WANTING HIM TO BE THEIR “ONE FRIEND”

opinion:
“I DON’T WANT TO READ YOUR ESSAY ANY MORE THAN YOU WANT TO WRITE IT” - Your Professor

 

This entry was posted on Wednesday, November 7, 2007 at 12:59 am and is filed under headlines, relationships, sports. Tagged: , , , , . You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

14 Responses to “HEADLINES THIS WEEK”

  1. Woodward Says:
    Wednesday, November 7, 2007 at 1:03 am

    “local” headline is a true story about my old roommate. If you’re out there reading this, I love ya buddy!

  2. Mastermind Theatre Says:
    Wednesday, November 7, 2007 at 1:08 am

    Celebrity:
    In a daylight-savings-time fiasco, Flava Flav set his clock forward an hour instead of back, making him two hours off. Thankfully, he had no place to go, and no one missed him. Yeeeeaaaah boooooy.

  3. thatoneNCUgirl Says:
    Wednesday, November 7, 2007 at 11:10 am

    i love using this week’s opinion line on my roommates … i hate reading papers!

  4. Hmmm..... Says:
    Wednesday, November 7, 2007 at 6:57 pm

    Hey! The idea for that bumper sticker was mine!!!

    I was royalties…..

  5. thoughtful Says:
    Wednesday, November 7, 2007 at 7:00 pm

    Do you mean you “are royalty” or you “want royalties?”

  6. thoughtful Says:
    Wednesday, November 7, 2007 at 7:05 pm

    By the way . . . the Holy Spirit would never go to Chipotle! He would go straight to Matt’s Bar for a Juicy Lucy.

  7. Hmmm..... Says:
    Wednesday, November 7, 2007 at 7:12 pm

    want… not was (my bad)

  8. lukeskywalker Says:
    Wednesday, November 7, 2007 at 7:14 pm

    Or Britt’s for a pint of Guiness

  9. Smokingun Says:
    Thursday, November 8, 2007 at 8:24 pm

    I agree with thoughtful, If I was the Holy Spirit… I would want my cheese to be melted.

  10. Ed Rockwell Says:
    Thursday, November 8, 2007 at 10:00 pm

    Must’ve been the girls basketball game. Did the horrendous cheerleaders from last year have anything to do with the disaster?

  11. Hmmm... Says:
    Sunday, November 11, 2007 at 3:54 pm

    P.S. I like the new look of the site… the top part.

  12. Woodward Says:
    Sunday, November 11, 2007 at 5:26 pm

    the new logo and banner are designed by our very own Smokingun

  13. thatoneNCUgirl Says:
    Tuesday, November 13, 2007 at 4:14 pm

    Lol …

  14. Anon-odyne Says:
    Friday, February 15, 2008 at 11:57 pm

    Your opinion headline is more true than you know.

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