HEADLINES THIS WEEK

front page:
COMMUTER WAKES UP, TURNS OFF ALARM, GOES BACK TO SLEEP

local:
TWO FRESHMEN SEEN WALKING TOGETHER, PRESUMED DATING

arts & entertainment:
CHORALE WHITTLED DOWN INTO QUARTET

lifestyles:
MALE NUDITY ESSENTIAL TO MALE BONDING

business:
NCU COFFEE SHOP FAILING BECAUSE NO ONE KNOWS IT EXISTS

health:
LITERAL HEART ONLY FIGURATIVELY BROKEN

opinion:
“I BASICALLY TEACH MY STRATEGIC MANAGEMENT CLASS” -ALAN KARRER

3 Responses to “HEADLINES THIS WEEK”

  1. baristamike Says:

    I took my dog for a walk yesterday, you wouldn’t believe the talk around town.

  2. Ummm.... Says:

    NCU has a coffee shop?

  3. this person Says:

    my freshman year i was seen with a member of the opposite sex and so many people came up to me and asked when we started dating. … come on people, girls and guys can just be FRIENDS!!! … its not going to end the world, hahah.

    or will it?

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